>walking home from a party late one evening >several guys were following me, as my drunk ass managed to piss them off by existing >try to walk faster, to no avail, as I’m drunk as shit >catch me in some random student neighbourhood >oh shit, my ass is about to be beaten >still in talking phase >lights flick on in a house >three guys in full musketeer garb walk out >leader is some blond guy with a beard, eyepatch, and some weird-ass accent >“What sort of ruffians would be accosting someone outside our residence? Stand and deliver!” >guys start yelling at them to fuck off, that I deserved to get my ass beaten >“Very well, then. Draw steel, you blackguard!” >all three of them draw rapiers on their belts >guys run >“I know not why those foul men sought your harm, but come and tell us the tale, stranger!” >spend remainder of evening drinking mulled wine with lunatics >bunch of Swedish re-enactors live there >blond guy is actually missing an eye; lost it in an machine shop accident >stagger home completely drunk with a hat
I had no idea people like that existed. Or had the money to rent a house.
in addition to two comments reading “FUCKING EPIC” and “THIS A THOUSAND TIMES THIS” op elaborated further in another post:
Holy shit, is this still being posted?
I figure I owe /tg/ a bit of an update on these guys.
Their leader, O he of one eye and little common sense, nearly had his visa revoked for these kinds of shenanigans. One too many arrests meant that his right to stay in the country was contested, and he had to go to court to defend himself and prevent his visa from being revoked.
I was his ride to court, and had to testify to the board that he shouldn’t be deported for lack of common sense or social normality.
His defense? A written speech, about three pages long, about the rights of man, the education he has received here, and the opportunities for a one-eyed machinist. The spirit of his crimes were all in defense of people who would otherwise suffer. For other witnesses, he had some of the random people he’d helped out, including one memorable point where a woman, nearly on the verge of tears, pointed out how he’d taken on a guy threatening to rape her and carrying a knife by whipping out a fencing saber, disarming him, and mocking him in his thick Swedish accent so that the girl could call the cops. Something like a dozen people all showed up, explaining how this dude, despite his eccentricities, made the country better.
He was not deported, and lives here to this very day, stalking the streets in musketeer garb, rescuing drunks, and dispensing his own brand of justice.
Just wanted to let everyone who isn’t aware yet know
-The amount of dms you can send on Twitter per day is now limited unless you have Twitter Blue, I can’t tell if it’s a 24hr period or if it resets at midnight but I ran out of “allowed” dms to my friend at 2:30am last night
-Elon has decided to rebrand Twitter to “X” and “get rid of all the birds”, completely removing the massive brand recognition Twitter has
-Tumblr is apparently trending in technology on Twitter right now
Also Japanese Twitter is having a field day because the rebranding would result in Twitter being called “X Japan”, which happens to be the name of a very famous Japanese rock band that’s been around since the 80s
x japan’s founder has already posted a thinly veiled legal warning because apparently not only would it be hilariously stupid to make twitter japan “x japan”, but the band owns the trademark, so they can’t
we justifiably give Biden a lot of shit but I think “at least 3” is the funniest possible response to some right wing dipshit asking you how many genders there are
Explaining to all companies that the three requirements for me to use a social media with any frequency are:
A chronological follow-only feed, ideally which I can set as default
Anonymity (my real name and face are not required)
Have a desktop version
You may call me boomer or whatever but if a social media doesn’t have bare minimum these three things then I will never use it ever. I won’t even make an account. You can suck at everything else but these are non-negotiable. The fact that they are anathema to profitability does not matter to me. If you cannot provide me these three things then I will simply not use any social media at all.
